Goodbye 2010,

Tonight's the night I will forget the bad times, and will solely focus on the better times that I know will come to me. Because I deserve to. There will be laughters, and even though I know there will be cries too, I'll keep in mind that I've put up with enough shit to now finally deserve some long-time happiness. I'm gonna smile like nothing's ever hurt me, and I'll shine like I've never done before. Tonight's the night everything will change. I'll make sure it will.

©Claudia, dec. 31, 2010

Have a happy New Year. Stay true to yourself. And make this year everything you want it to be. Because as long as you believe, everything's possible.
 

With love,

            Claudia.

Through it all, just stand up!

Can you believe the year's almost over? I don't. For me, this year seemed to pass by faster than normally. I guess that's because so much has happened during this year. I've had ups, and of course I had downs. I also realised that I've changed hugely. At the beginning of 2010, I couldn't stand up for myself. I always cared for others more than I did for myself. But halfway 2010, something within me changed, and I stood up for myself like never before. I learned that, if something's hurting you, you should put yourself first and let it go. Not stick with it because you're afraid to hurt others. Or because you're afraid for their reaction. I realised that I needed to change things to become happy. And even though letting go hurt me a lot, even though I knew it would take ages for me to get over it.. It made me realise that in the end, I'd come out stronger. And I did. From that moment, I truly stood up for myself. I stood up for my opinion, and stopped caring for what others think of me. And trust me, that was a real tough mountain for me to come across. Too long I've been afraid to hurt others with what I thought. Too long I've hurt myself by sticking with what crushed me. Too long I gave in to others, without thinking about myself. And now the time has come, to stand up for myself, and think of me instead. I'm the one who has to live my life, not anyone else. And as long as I am happy with my life the way I live it, nothing else matters.

With that thought, I wanna end this year, and get into the new one. Hoping that things will only get better.

With love,

            Claudia.

I'm so much better without you.

Singlet: H&M

Vest: H&M

Loose pants: Vero Moda

Shoes: Shoe Outlet

Rockin' around the Christmas tree.

Just some photos I took for my Photography assignment. (:

I wanna be a part of something I don't know.

Shirt: Primark

Vest: H&M

Jeans: H&M

Shoes: ?

Jump into the Unknown.

Heartache: Everyone goes through it at some point at their lifes. Not only can it take away all of our confidence, it tires us till our bones. It makes us do the stupidest things so that we can feel better. It tears us up and breaks us down.

Whether it's your boy- or girlfriend breaking up with you, or losing a close friend.. Heartaches SUCK. At least, they do at first. After a while, you might realise that what happened, is for the better. I mean, let's face it.. What's the point in staying with your boy- or girlfriend if you're constantly arguing? If your feelings have changed? What's the point in acting as if a friendship is perfect, when in fact.. You and your friend always disagree? When you and your friend just can't get along? Or whatever else you can think of.. Why cause yourself more hurt, by sticking with what's hurting you?

One of the main reasons why people tend to stick to what's hurting them most, is fear of the unknown. Deep down inside, they know it's for the better. But they don't wanna give up on something so well-known, something they can hold on to. They don't wanna jump into a new situation where everything is strange. Different. They'd rather stick with what they dó know, but makes them unhappy, than they want to take the risk of jumping into what they don't know, perhaps finding something that makes them happier than before. It's fear of stepping out of their (unhappy) comfort zone, what keeps them from becoming everything they want to be.

What's frightning is that, when you jump into the unknown to make a new start.. You leave behind what you have held on to so badly. And leaving behind something you once loved, is never easy. It's even so hard it causes your heart a lot of damage. Sometimes more damage than you could ever imagine.

Everyone deals with situations like this differently. Personally, I am the kind of girl that has always had a rough time leaving the past behind. Especially people, or situations I once loved. In my case, it takes ages to pick myself up, and move on. When something like this happens to me, I experience heartache as one of the most painful feelings in the world. To me, it feels like my whole body is ripped apart, every piece thrown in a corner, all mixed up. When something that's happened really gets to me, I lose myself. I lose my confidence. My engergy. I lose who I am as a person. And it takes a while, but on my way back up, I learn things about myself I wouldn't have learned if I stayed in my comfort zone.

Being heartbroken, and getting over what broke you down, shows that you're strong enough to leave something that hurt you behind, and start over.

I know that in the beginning, it seems like heartaches hurt so much more than staying in your comfort zone would ever do. But trust me, in the end, you'll be greatful for the decision you've made. And though it might seem like the wrong decision at first.. As long as you keep in mind whý you had to step out of your comfort zone, you'll soon come to realise that perhaps, you didn't make the wrong decision at all.

Getting over a heartache is progress; You have to do it step by step. Don't be too hard on yourself, 'cause there's no point in being mad at yourself for having second thoughts at first. There's no point in being mad for missing it, maybe even wanting it back. That's only natural. Healing takes time. And a lot of patience.

You have to go through it all to come out as a stronger, better person in the end. Trust me, you're gonna have relapses, wishing for everything to be like it was before. You're gonna have days when you just wanna sit at home, and cry. But you're gonna have to pull yourself through.
And you'll notice, day by day, it'll get better. Slowly, you'll get back to the person you were. Only better. You'll come back stronger.

Try to look at heartaches as an experience, not something bad.

 As I said before: I believe that everything happens for a reason. So there must be a reason why you have to go through this heartache. Whether it's to become a stronger person, or to meet people that can make you happier than the people in your past would ever be able to. There's a reason why people from your past don't make it to your future.

And remember; With every door you close, opens another door. The decisions you make in your life, make you who you are. It's up to you whether you're gonna stay in the bad situation you're in, and continue to feel unhappy.. Or take the risk to jump into the unknown, perhaps finding something better.

With love,

            Claudia.

Written by Claudia.
Monday, dec. 13, 2010

©This piece of text is all written by me. It's an original, so please do not use without permission.  I mean, how would you like the idea of someone just stealing your texts, pretending they're the ones who wrote it, when in fact, it isn't theirs at all?

You're not gonna reach my telephone.

Yesterday, one of my oldest friends (I know her for over 13 years now) turned 18, and of course she threw a party. (: There weren't many people, but that didn't take away the fun. I've had a great time.

Here's photos of the outfit I wore to the party yesterday (:

Cardigan: Vero Moda

Top: Primark

Shorts: New Yorker

Panty: H&M

Shoes: v.Haren

Just a day, just an ordinary day.

Blouse: H&M

Leggings: ?

Shoes: ?

Live faster, love stronger.

A few days ago when I was bored, I decided to customize a simple, white t-shirt. I've wanted to do this for a while already, but I never had the time, and stuff to do it with. Up until now. :-). Personally, I kinda like the way it came out. Of course, it's not the greatest in the world, but I had fun doing this, and hey, you've got to admit.. It could've been worse, right?

The lyrics I used on this t-shirt is from a song by Hey Monday. It's called Hurricane Streets, and it's one of my fave songs by them. It's a really good song, and I thought the lyrics would be good lyrics to customize a t-shirt with.

Anyways, here's the result :D
(Btw, everything's written and drawn by me. I just printed the texts and image, and then re-wrote them on the t-shirt.)

With love,

            Claudia.

T-shirt: H&M